Paint Drying (2016) Online

While some might balk at the 10 hour run time, I can wholeheartedly say that it is completely worth the time. It is especially valuable for those who are in, or are considering entering, the field of politics; the patience required to truly appreciate this work will prepare you for the drudge of your chosen career.

Those who *can* appreciate the brilliance of "Paint Drying" will find it extremely fulfilling, and an incredible satire on modern filmmaking; the drying paint is symbolic of how after the exciting parts (the painting equaling the writing, acting, etc.), everyone involved in the production must sit through the meticulous post-filming processes (editing, sfx, etc), which can take a seemingly interminable amount of time.

I won't spoil the ending, but suffice to say, it was a satisfying conclusion to the hours I had spent on the edge of my seat, with my eyes glued to the screen.

(Also, Charlie Lyne is amazing for this beautiful joke!)

For some hours, the film does progress quite slowly, however the plot does thicken. As it rolls on, a brush of irony should be noticed.

Towards the end, some dry humour is noticed.

The result is a cinematographic representation of the renewal of masonry with white paint, and I would say that the director was more than successful in portraying this in a consistent and factual way.

The only negative point regarding this film that springs to mind, is that it ends before we get to see the final result - at the end there are clearly some areas that have not dried completely. Despite this disappointment, I would still recommend adding this timeless classic to any home's film library.

Also notable is the lack of a "Caution: Wet Paint" sign.

In a few words, this film does exactly what it says on the tin.

Here in the land of the free and the home of "sex is worse than violence," the MPAA reviews and rates every single movie that gets a wide release, thereby ensuring that little Timmy will never be subjected to the unimaginable horror of seeing a single female nipple floating amidst a sea of simulated carnage. Across the pond, they have a similarly draconian organization called the British Board of Film Classification (BBFC), whose review process costs filmmakers the equivalent of $9 per minute of footage. This is a particular problem for independent filmmakers like Charlie Lyne, who doesn't just have $1,300 to toss around when he has to pay his staff in whatever the fancy British equivalent of Monopoly money is. Britty Bucks? To stand up to this tyranny, Lyne took to Kickstarter. Now, you're probably thinking that he did so in order to raise the funds to get one of his films rated, and in a way you'd be right... but this was not just any film. See, Lyne promised that for every nine dollars and change he raised, he'd submit footage of another minute of paint drying to the BBFC. He raised enough to force the stuffy British censorship authority to dutifully sit through around 10 hours of white paint drying on a brick wall. The board assigned the imaginatively titled Paint Drying a U rating (the equivalent of a G here in the United States) before notifying Peter Jackson that his record had been broken.

This documentary flawed me. Going in I thought it would be boring, but It was the complete opposite. I often looked at the screen in total shock in how meticulously crafted the set design was. I don't really feel the need to bring up the directing but I'm going to anyway. The way Charlie Lyne handles the camera with such precision, you can tell not a single frame was waisted. I can safely say that this might be the best movie ever created, and that It will be a modern classic. I will be sure to watch it again as soon as possible and share it to all my friends and family. Would recommend with out hesitation.

This movie has such a high rating because people rate it a 10 thinking its the quintessential 10/10 movie. I say different! I say this is the quintessential 5/10 movie, mostly due to my rating system.

I use a rating system from 0 to 10. I consider a 5 average, and use it as my baseline. There are two types of 5/10 movies for me: something completely average or a totally mixed bag where the good aspects about equally cancel out the bad. The latter is easy enough to understand. Paint Drying is the former. A film's achievements will raise the score and any flaws or missed opportunities to objectively improve the film will lower it. A film can be technically perfect with no flaws on the filmmaking level but if nothing noteworthy is done with the premise, characters, or presentation of said premise and characters, I'd give it a 5 since nothing was done with those tools. If you make a film called Paint Drying where the camera is turned on right after a fresh coat of paint is applied to a wall and lasts ten hours, the only way you could technically screw it up is if for some reason the camera wasn't pointed directly at the wall and it wasn't ten hours. While the movie technically didn't do anything wrong, I'd still give it a 5/10 since it didn't do anything clever or noteworthy with the idea. A more conventional example to illustrate this concept would be the Disney film The Rescuers Down Under; it has beautiful animation and there's nothing wrong with it on a technical level, but the story, characters, and tropes are largely standard and recycled. Congratulations! You made a standard, passable film that didn't really break any new ground!

Just because the director's vision was completely satisfied and they made the movie they wanted to in the exact way they wanted to, that doesn't automatically make it a 10/10 movie. I could say "I'm going to make a terrible no-budget indie slasher flick for $100 that isn't self-aware in the least" and even if I made the movie I set out to make, that doesn't automatically mean its a great movie. That would actually be a pretty terrible movie.